Last year my son Ben had the misfortune to break his arm – cycling accident, “Well dad I was trying to do a wheelie and get airborne on a traffic bump…” Chip off the old block.
I couldn’t say anything really, he bore the injury with much stoicism, and a metal pin and a few months in a cast were the outcome. He was amazed at the weakness in his arm when the cast came off, and a strict regime of exercise followed.
Cut to present day and despite his muscle mass recovery he is still having some pain, so I contact the doctors (the new doctors here in Kilmarnock) and the Physio telephone appointment gives him a month more exercise to do before he can be assessed (in real life).
Many people would have been dismayed, especially since it was essentially the same programme he was already doing, but to my son’s credit, he understood the need, and tholed it out.
A month flies by and I report no real improvement using their – all new- on line system, and am told to phone and make a “real appointment”, and so it starts to go wrong.
Seemingly – for some completely inexplicable reason – the bookings for the physio cannot be viewed more than 2 weeks ahead, no-one one can explain, it’s the new system apparently.
Of course with the public holiday as well, and the fact he’s only in certain days, there are no slots left, so I need to phone back in a week, on Tuesday.
After my long experience with British Gas, I have the phone ringing on Tuesday at 08:30 when they open. I run through the explanation again, highlighting that this is what I’ve been asked to do. There is much umming and ahhing from the other end and I’m put on hold- never a good sign.
“I’m just going to speak to my supervisor Mr Wilson….”
<Hold>
“We’re just checking something…”
<Hold>
“I’m afraid we have nothing available, all the physio slots are alocated, you’d need to call..”
“Wait, YOU asked me to call back Today, Because your system wouldn’t let you look further ahead, and this was the best -YOUR WORDS – time to get a new slot when they opened up!”
“Let me check” <Long Hold> “Yes Mr Wilson but unfortunately what has happened is that the Doctors themselves have filled in all the slots without telling us, they’re not supposed to do that (This is said with a conspiratorial “naughty doctors” tone)”.
I am not best pleased. And I press forward with my “not best pleased voice” enumerating that everything has been done by their book, point by point. This nets me another long Hold.
When they come back, I am asked to phone back later today, and they see if Ben can be refered elsewhere as they cannt now open up a physio slot.
I call back later. Word has gone out,
“Ah Mr Wilson! we’ve been expecting you” ( I am now clearly a <James Bond > villian – I rush for my menacing eye patch).
A referal might take a year! An “urgent” referal might take 4-6 months. So I’m faster just calling back when the next lot of slots open up (these will be dates in July). I enquire innocently whether there is some chance that these too will have been “naughtilly” pre allocated by the doctors?
“We’ll we’re just# reception, so we can’t tell them what to do” (I read this as a big YES).
Anyone recommend a good private physio?
Next week on IaDL; The plumbers are coming!
#That was their word, not mine. I’m much more likely to say “They’re JUST doctors” after an upringing where an MD’s off hand remark was treated as a stone tablet handed down on the mountain.
Dalmallyfest the Asylum 