Raised by punctuality nazis:
Punctuality, “the politeness of princes” . It’s hard to be sure, but it seems to me that in todays laid back society it’s just unfashionable to be on time. People wander in five minutes late without a second glance, in fact , five minutes late, would barely be considered late at all.
I grew up with parents who were scrupulous in the area of time keeping. ON time was late, you should be there 5 minutes early. If we were meeting in the pub “about half five” I’d be the one trying to hold a free table for eight, from 05:25, frequently occupying it myself for a hour..
I am so seldom late for work that a colleague once phoned me 15minutes before I was due to start, to see if anything was wrong, because I wasn’t already there! (I was fine, the traffic was not).
I ocassionally worked with my Dad (a builder) in my youth. As with many father-son relationships this was not always a happy or easy situation. However such was my Dads strict devotion to time, that, even faced with a task which he could not complete without assistance, he would drive off if I was not sitting in the van, bang on the agreed pick up time, more than once, when my hand was actually on the door.
Many people would see this as “cutting off ones nose to spite your face” but it did teach me important lessons; if Dad said 7am, he actually meant 06:55am, and, you can’t run at 30mph even if you are holding on to the car.
I’ve never been sure whether my mum was a punctuality nazi in her own right, or just years of Dad rubbed off on her. This manifests in other ways. When I lived locally, I might “pop in in half a hour”, this would be mentally reinterpretated as 11:37 exactly, with phone calls following at 11:38 to establish the reason for lateness. Unfortunately now I live 20 odd, traffic filled, miles away , and since transit can be very unpredictable, I have become very reluctant to give any specifc time at all. “In the morning” (First phone call 12:01), “around lunchtime” (first call 13:01), “soon” (unacceptable!! what if she is out? -(my 83 year old mum, might of course be out, at the solitary corner shop across the road, vsible from her window)).
I am sure she is not going to change her ways anytime soon, certainly not at the behest of her “imprecise” son.
However I find that there is also a hidden aspect to this desparate clockwatching. True, I am seldom late -Once, three friends decided all their watches nust be wrong, because I hadn’t turned up yet. But seldom is not never, this is real life, and MY “dogslife” at that, things happen, tyres bl ow, ladders slip, reactors go into metdown….. however I recognise a great reluctance in myself to be late (even with a good excuse), better to be absent (Anyone can be ill after all).
Also, and this came to the fore recently, if I miss your birthday/anniversary/high day, I always feel that a “late” card is inexcusable, it’s a compounding of the error. You’ll get a card/gift next year (on time).My Lovely wife however, takes quite the opposite position (surprise!) and feels it important to sent those greeting, however belated.
Similarly, it would have been “easier” to miss this episode of IaDL , than to complete it on Tuesday.
This is surely not a issue with a right or wrong position, and athough I am strict with myself, I strive not to judge others on their tardiness (hard sometimes). All I can ask is that you try not to judge me on my punctuality..
Next week on IaDL: Grammar! Don’t get me started on it…..
Dalmallyfest the Asylum 