Dealing with the public – as anyone who has had to do so will tell you – is ever an education; just when you thought people could be any more stupid…
However, in fairness, the tide sometimes runs the other way. Like the gardening store advisor who tried to sell me chicken wire to keep off carrot flies (I do not want to meet THEM!). Or the assistant at Riggside’s “world of Pallets” (not it’s actual name, but if you ever see it, you will understand), who couldn’t understand that I wanted to buy a pallet, or possibly , what one was.
My recent building endevours have reached a brief pause, ocassioned by my real work, but I have striven to get project 1 complete before the hiatus. As part of the finishing off, I required a small amout of light coloured gravel (Blond in building parlance).
Google says this is available, and in stock, at the local B&Q.
This is a short walk – the sort of distance you, I, might actually carry a bag of gravel, but on arrival, I can find no blond gravel of any kind, much less the “Cotswald Yellow 10mm” that my phone still says is in stock. I am forced, against my better nature, to actually ask.
“Do you have an item code sir?” – as it so happens, I have said code right here on my phone.
and a moment later the helpful staff member has led me to 40 bags of Blue Slate chippings. He doesn’t actually say “Tah! Dah!” but it’s there in the gesture.
I explain that the product I want, the one displayed beside the code is; ” Cotswald Yellow 10mm gravel” , “Yes, Sir and here it is…”
Just in case of some hidden disabilty, I read carefully aloud from the 40 bags, “This is -Blue Slate Chippings – (Large Letters, and quite obviously large blue slate chips),…”
“Yes Sir, but according to the code (double checks) these are Cotswald Yellow 10mmm gravel” (There is another Tah -dah! gesture, but I sense, a slight hesitation).
I start to ask if they LOOK like Cotswald Yellow, but think the better of it.
My eye is caught by a dsplay of small bowls containg samples of the various aggregates, including, yes, some Cotswald Yellow….
“This is what I’m after, do you have any bags of this?”
My highly trained staff member, scans the attached code, “yes sir! Blue Slate Chippings…….”
I had to go and lie down in a dark room.
I did get some yellow gravel in the Range (also local) but as they are creating a massive Christmas display in September, I can never return there again.
Next week on IaDl …Don’t step on my Blue Slate chips!……hmmmm
Dalmallyfest the Asylum 