(white powder)
My older boy has just turned 20 this week, which makes it twenty years since I stopped smoking. I was a solid, “pack -of-rolling-baccy-a-day” man, and I’d tried giving up numerous times.
This had mostly taught me how not to do it, when the time came. Not for me – only when I’m drinking, only socially, only outside, only a cigar on high days…. the one thing I’d learned, was it had to be an all or nothing call.
Still becoming a Dad was a clear pivot point in life, and a better reason I had never had. Between that, and my intimate knowledge of the pitfalls, it was actually fairly straightfowrds.
When I was recovering from my stroke, you get issued with “the little penguin book of strokes” – as I like to call it. There are many possible causes, and also a lot of lifestyle factors which are heavilly contributary. Alcohol, excercise, weight, diet. (Smoking but that was ancient history by then). I drank quite a lot, and particularly rolled up with shift work, I was a classic “binge drinker”. The guidelines, well lets just say I might have managed the guideline as a daily limit – usually. (If that sounds OK, I’ll clarify it is in fact a weekly limit).
It was the single act that I could take to make the greatest difference to my risk of another stroke (factor of 10 ). It was a much more challenging lifestyle change, and quite illuminating how much of my (our) life revolved around drink. Happily, I have found that – for me – that did not need to be an all or nothing call. I can drink some on high days, have just one glass, and then put the cork back in the bottle, have some Tea, and a non alcoholic beverage (some of the beers are pretty good these days).
Speaking of Non-alcoholic-beverages, I gave up my lifetime relationship with Coke-a-cola, about one year ago.
For much of my life, I had consumed around a litre a day, and only the real thing, none of your cheap immitation colas, and certainly not Pepsi. I did flirt briefly with Diet coke, but in the quanities I drank, aspartame and I don’t get on. I had no one big reason, but it was time, and a time when I was again wrestling with some of my life choices. I told no-one and ceratinly did not leave it to New Year. I instinctively knew it would have to be a complete break.
And so recently they decided I had type 2 Diabetes. Change or medicate? Well I’m already on a rattling selection of daily pills, so Change it is. As a rolling shift worker my big sin is snacking, -biscuits, crisps, chocolate. Sometimes you really need that sugar hit at 4am, sometimes, it’s just a reason to step away from the desk.
You might think that after the first three, this would be (metaphorically), a piece of cake?
I’m here to tell you that it’s way, way harder. The good news, is that after my last blood test, I’m down to “pre diabetic” (and only just, if I may say), but the urge to runout and celebrate with a bag of donuts is very strong. I’m really hoping this is like drink and I can still have “some”, and not like fags…
Sometimes I have a point, sometimes I hope to entertain, sometimes it’s just a place to share.
Thanks for listening.
Next week on IaDL : Where’s my (petrol) tank?
Dalmallyfest the Asylum 