(A life in the day)
“No we didn’t make any contact with your breakfast chef Andre”
“The car waited 10 minutes at number 6, and I phoned the number ending ..098 myself and left a message”
“If you see the 18 page spread sheet you emailed at 17:00 on Christmas eve, page ..7 ….5 lines down….”
“He may well have moved, but that’s the address you’ve sent us”
“So you’re telling me (now), that every single phone number is actually for the line above the line it’s printed on?”
“Ho Ho Ho Merrry! Christmas !”
“So your general manager is actually at the address (in Falkirk) you sent us first on the 23rd, and not at the address (in Glasgow) it was changed to verbally on the 24th.?”
“Fortunately sir ALL calls are recorded… yes I can find it…. the caller gives the name… oh actually it’s you…”
“I couldn’t say for Falkirk sir… we are Glasgow based”
“Festive greetings to you too…”
“The driver went into the reception on foot at my insistance”
“Well no, I don’t imagine he went into the first floor bar, at 5:30am”
“If you see where we’ve asked for a mobile number or a manned contact number… how you’ve left that blank… “
“Well at this point on Christmas day, I couldn’t say how long…”
“Merry…..<Click>”
“Hello! Asif? I have a taxi booked to bring you into hotel X…..”
“You’ve swapped with Charlotte?”
“I’m sorry to have woken you, they haven’t updated….
“….that wasn’t very festive”
“Hello I’m the duty contoller, I believe you wish to make a complaint?”
“The driver did, in fact, call you, it’s recorded automatically”
“I see…. so he woke your children up…”
“I’m sorry but we have nothing from the hotel (leafs through an unhandy 12 pages) saying NOT to phone..”
“Hello Angela we have a car….not Angela? …..Charlotte?….sorry…. are you by any chance the Charlotte from Hotel X?”
BAH HUMBUG!
I hope you’ve enjoyed this brief taste of life at the coal face of public transport on Christmas.
Next week on IaDL … Doing more in ’24
Dalmallyfest the Asylum 