(mental health)
You drive your car into a busier (than usual) section of town. With the traffic, it’s constant go , stop, go, stop. You’re having to change gear constantly (it’s a “stick shift” for you Americans). You notice a grating noise, and maybe some unexpected stiffness, with the continual changes. This persists through the town, but, hey, once you’re back out on the motorway, just sitting in fifth, it’s fine, maybe you were just imagining it.
Sounds like the clutch to me, but do I just ignore it, and try to avoid driving at busy times?
I’ve done two consecutive weeks of nights, and then a third of mixed shifts, ending in more nights. Overall, I’ve not done the sleep pattern changes well. This is hardly something I’ve not faced before in my twenty plus years at the coalface of public transport. But this time I feel I’m struggling more.
There is a “grating noise” while I’m trying to change gears.
Of course in this case, it is entirely inside my head, and I do wonder if maybe, I am, just imagining it?
In a somewhat unexpected twist, I have a “conversation”#(as opposed to, talk) with elder son, where I am actually able to proffer some useful experience of life, and we discuss the need to occassionally fully disengage.
Take the needle completely off the record, don’t just move it to a different track; is my suggested analogy.
This does make sense, although if I didn’t have to elaborate on “record” and “needle” it would probably be clearer (younger viewers – listening to this on Tick-o-gram or whatever – should ask their parents).
Typically, I recognise that I fail to take my own advice, especially on Nightshifts, where it is particularly easy to become stuck on the mere cycle of work, sleep, eat, work, exist.
Today I watched the dawn. Later, I may play guitar (which end up?).
I’m actually quite good at “Keep moving”, keep stretching and fitting in little bits of physical wellbeing around my office job. What I now see I need, just as much, is the mental wellbeing exercises.
To use more modern terminology – I’m away to take the cassette out of the player, and run the head cleaner…
Next week on IaDL : Someting slightly festive.
# Conversation – Both father and son listen and speak. Talk – “In my day….” / “It’s not like that now, and besides…”
Dalmallyfest the Asylum 