The Old E-Bayer

A very good friend recently (in online chat) sent a link to a poem called “The Old Astronomer” by Sarah Williams.

I was unfamiliar with it and much taken by the piece, but in the online exchange the post was quickly “rubbished” by my friends husband (I stress, in a humorous manner). She in turn decried him as a Philistine, and as the exchange escalated, I felt compelled as a mutal friend to intecede and attempt to reconcile this martial strife. I thought that perhaps a slight “Re-imagining” of the poem – in his own image – might allow the husband (also my good friend) a graceful retreat and restore harmony. I had to focus on one of his outstanding traits…

The old E-bayer

Pass me sons my e-bay laptop, I would know my total count,

loss and profit figures ready, for the final closed account.

Ready figures on a life’s work, worlds I’ve conquered sale by sale,

So that I may show in earnest, if succeeded , or if failed.

Remember that I leave you always, boxes yet of cycle tops,

in the shed awaiting listing, there still remain yet, ample stocks.

Among them, many quite unique, and many pristine still, and new,

sons the burden of their selling, I bequeath to each of you.

Ah, though many laughed and pointed, still my ebay empire’s grown.

Sales across the globe accounted, to markets far, my wares have flown

What to us the mere distraction, of employment day by day?

When, in electronic selling, stakes far higher are in play.

Lo it rings! Another buyer! One last shirt must wing away,

as must I, now close the listings, for the post I cannot stay.

I have sold too much to trammel, one last item will complete,

when departed, list my remnant, get a good price, I entreat.